I'm feeling the fear, yet I still feel excited

I always like being in a comfort zone, and I always hate it at the same time. What a dilemma

Recently, I don't really like to travel since it will remind me of choices. Travelling got full of choices: the destinations, the people in your team, the things you like (yes, you can't choose the things you see but you can choose what you remember after the trip)

We went to some lighthouse at the extreme east coast of the country. It took us more than half an hour to reach it and the view from the top of the lighthouse was quite nice (even though we didn't manage to see the sunset due to gloomy sky)

I then asked myself : "Is this just for me ? Those who stay here for years will probably not appreciate this scene like we do ?"

Same for all those ancient-looking towns which attract the tourists. How 'bout the people that actually need to live there and cope with all the under-invested infrastructures ?

1 of my friends really likes to carefully plan for the trip. She asked her friends all those die-die-must-see places. She noted down the prices of all the food we tried so that she can post to some travel forum later.

At first, I didn't like it. I hate planning when we travel and I just hate travelling just for the sake of telling people how many places I've been to.

Then, I realized I was also like that, just in a different way. Of many things we dislike, we unknowingly do it. I also like to boast 'bout my trips (how cool it was), to eagerly tell people how we managed to p-ee on the rock-next-to-the-ocean, to post the photo I took and keep checking FB for "likes"/"comments"

It's funny.

The last funny thing - which bugged me the most - is that I seem to take things so easy for those strangers but can't really let it go for the closed ones.